Adeeyoyo's Blog

I write what I feel…

English is as She is Spoke

47 Comments

 .

There are all shades of English:

Scottish English,

Irish English,

Welsh English,

All with English in common.

But whether some was gotten

At an auction

Or boughten for a fraction

Is anybody’s guess.

I went out with a guy from Reading.

At the end of the date

Was my face red –

I had pardoned most everything he said.

He could have spoken Finnish,

It may have been Yiddish or Flemish

Or something in between,

 But it certainly wasn’t English

As spoken by the queen.

.

©DGA 06 December 2011 15:04

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Author: adeeyoyo

I am a middle-aged South African woman, living in Johannesburg. I began writing poetry towards the end of May 2010. I love animals – sometimes more than people!

47 thoughts on “English is as She is Spoke

  1. ha. there may be days i dont speak english…smiles…i find the adjustment and dialects and coloquialisms interesting in language

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    • I wasn’t even considering South African, Australian or American English. Just English in the UK – but the accents sometimes stymie me (Scottish and Irish not too bad – it’s the British!!!).

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  2. Sooo, the queen’s English is not so pure, as we have been led to believe.

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  3. Language has the patience of a mother and resilience of rubber. As a child struggling to find expression, as a youth giving messages of love, or as an easy-chair scholar innovating expressions for his / her philosophy, the language melds itself into whatever mold you want to pour it. Still, in all its forms, raw or refined, it endeacours to somehow convey the meaning the heart intended. Gestures, tone and tenor, warmth of the touch are its accessories. It can even become the darling of the Queen by its mere simplicity and animated spirit. You have touched a wide gamut and I think I got the humour. I liked it Denise.

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    • Thank you, Sunamu. This post was written intending to humourously point out that, listening to the many different accents, it was sometimes like hearing a foreign language. One’s mind is of necessity continuously occupied with attempting translation of what one hears.

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  4. This ‘ ere is proper Inglish, just like wot the Queen speaks!

    That was a good’un Mrs D

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  5. Denise, you left out American English, you would not recognize it, dialects by derelicts, idioms from idiots, and me I’m from New England…go fig ya..

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  6. HAHA Denise. Like I thought it was so cool, man (or lady).
    Some versions of English do make one wince, and some even I can’t understand.
    John

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    • Now that’s what I wanted to hear, John. So now I know it’s not me, or my ears, that are at fault. I suppose you get used to, at least, the way people speak in the particular area in which you live. Thank you.

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  7. Then there’s Online English.. LOL!

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  8. I live in Miami, Florida, USA. I think there are 12 of us left that speak English(American). The rest is Spanish, Jamaican or Haitian patois and
    too much “you are under arrest” police talk. The police often talk with
    bullets instead of words. There is also politician talk: “I did not pedal influence or accept any bribes or favors and will be proven innocent.” Yeah, when Hades freezes over.

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  9. Och, mon, English is a strange wee beastie full of dreek and dreck! 😉

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    • Bwahaha, Nancy, ‘dreck’ is another good one. On googling it I now have found ‘threax’ Old English and ‘threakkr’ Old Norse, both meaning the same thing, lol! 😆 We will have a whole new dictionary soon…

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  10. Lovely, Denise. I think there isn’t much in the way of English “as spoken by the queen” – certainly not around where I live (although there are a good many pretenders). I love

    But whether some was gotten
    At an auction
    Or boughten for a fraction…

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    • Thank you, Ruth. I am right there with you about the ‘pretenders’, lol. Sometimes one wonders how all these different sounds can originate from one source…

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  11. This one made me kind of chuckle. It was fun. 🙂

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  12. Very funny 🙂 Incidentally, Phil’s from Reading…

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  13. ….well. it was his university town.

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  14. What about Aussie English Denise?
    Good on ya mate, she’ll be right! Sanger is a sandwich, daks are trousers, flip flops are thongs (honest)!
    Need I go on?
    Everything is shortened and short words are lengthened!! Crazy!

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    • I thought Aussie would be much like SA, but we have sarmie for sandwich. Flip flops stays the same, pants is for trousers, shorts and all including panties. And, of course, ja is yes. Thanks Barb. 😛

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  15. Ain’t nuttin til you seen dat dere South. (Yes, some people really do talk this way in the Southern US.) It is entertaining to find how many versions of English there are. Funny post, Denise.

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  16. I doubt I can speak any of the Queen’s english. Lovely take though.

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  17. hahaha – very funny adeeyoyo. Amazing how the English language can become so many different species – and thank goodness for that.

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  18. haha – excellent! When I first moved here many moons ago, I asked a client for a stiffy (yes, I’m showing my age) to transfer his data, not realising that “stiffy” = “erection” in Australian English – he was whitefaced and I was red 🙂

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  19. I think different accents are highlighted in the regional accents of England. Many of them are so completely different from one another you would be forgiven for thinking you were in a diferent country. Very clever and funny poem!

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  20. As a man blighted with a slightly bizarre mixture of North Welsh and Bristolian in my accent, I enjoyed this very much!

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  21. I can’t even understand my own S of E grandchildren!

    Even the Queen has changed her English somewhat. – things like ‘my horses have done well’ instead of ‘may horses hev done well’..

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